Kaidan Alenko Prompt Project Collection
by Ovo
Summary: Prompted fic from the KAAS Prompt Project, in anthology format.
1. Prompt 1: Miscommunications

**Miscommunications**

If they lived, she was going to give him a long, grueling lecture on how _not_ to be an incompetent moron.

Granted, it wasn't entirely Kaidan's fault; she could admit that. Shepard... the _real_ Shepard, not the half-cocked Cerberus knockoff, wouldn't have been careless enough to fall into such an obvious trap. Hell, the real Shepard would have better covered her tracks, and they would never have found themselves in this situation to begin with.

She was not the real Shepard.

She'd have to tell him that, too.

If they lived.

She was fairly optimistic that they would... at least, Kaidan would. If whoever attacked them wanted him dead, he would have been dead by now, rather than merely drooling and unconscious. Getting his amp ripped out looked unpleasant, but he wasn't awake for it and being divested of his gear was at best an indignity; neither were fatal, to her knowledge.

Besides, it was his own damn fault for not running when he had the chance. The enemy – hired guns? No one she knew by sight, at any rate – apparently didn't know what to do with him. Not like her – one EMP blast or whatever and all her implants overloaded, dropping her out before the fight even started.

Being paralyzed was certainly giving her a lot of time to mull things over, although she could have done without being hardly able to breathe, and having a mouth full of grit. Idly, Shepard wondered what part of not answering his email and disappearing into parts unknown was unclear to Kaidan; she supposed she could have been clearer, and explained how she was quite literally not the woman he had fallen in love with, but then he probably would have wanted specifics and hell if she knew.

She had expected him to respect her silence, and instead he had tracked her down. In doing so, he had either tipped someone off or led them straight to her. Someone who might have wanted her alive, or had just handed her a slow death with plenty of time to think attached to it.

And beyond everything else, her nose itched.

Yep. They were going to have a _long_ talk about this one once she got her motor functions back. ...rather, _if_ she got her motor functions back.

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 1

**Prompt**: _"The reunion after Horizon and the Collectors defeat of Shepard and Kaidan. The catch; it must be silent NO DIALOG (or text or emails)! The set up or reason there is no talking is Artist or Author choice."_

**Noteworthy**: I still wonder whether Shepard would be susceptible to EMP-type weapons, being a total cyborg and all.

**Disambiguation**: My Main Shepard considers the Lazarus project to be skeezy science at best, so she suspects it is a smokescreen. Whether or not she's right... I have no idea.

**Published**: November 7th, 2011, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Mass Effect._


	2. Prompt 2: Due Process

**Due Process**

He wasn't sure what to expect. In terms of threats to galactic stability, Cerberus had been a dark horse. In many ways, this was a show of power; like Shepard was a show of power. Of all the things he could have done differently...

Glancing at the man on his right, to whom a dozen marines had given an unnecessary amount of space in a crowded airlock during their routine decontamination, Anderson frowned. "You'll be okay."

It wasn't an observation; at best, it was an order.

"I think I'm going to throw up," Alenko admitted. Anderson could understand the sentiment – the _Normandy_ may not have been home for him, not like it had been for Shepard or her then-lieutenant, but even so the sight from the airlock, encompassing the CIC to the cockpit, was disconcerting. Nor, for that matter, had he been on the Normandy when it exploded around him.

He needed someone he could trust and had offered Alenko the choice. It wasn't much of one, but he had never known the man to back down from something important merely because it stung.

With a heavy heart, Anderson nodded to the soldiers behind them. The commander went to work while the councilor took in Cerberus' _Normandy_.

"Secure the airlock," Alenko ordered the sergeant calmly. "No one leaves this ship."

Alenko caught up to him as he approached the CIC. The crew – bedecked in uniforms all matching the ship's flag – stared in awe or confusion as they passed... probably the latter, for the most part. One woman, of the same uniform but perhaps of a different mind than the rest, set a brisk pace for the elevator.

As they reached the forward end of what used to be the ship's map, now replaced with an holo of the new _Normandy_ itself, an amorphous VI interface grew out of a smaller holo terminal on the near side of the data console.

"Welcome aboard the Normandy SR2, Councilor Anderson. Staff Commander Alenko," it said, "I was directed to–"

Before it could complete its sentence, none other than Jeff Moreau appeared from the far side of the display, _walking_ – unassisted, yet stiff – towards them. This was something Anderson hadn't expected; by the look of it, neither had Alenko.

"What the hell?" the pilot – _former_ Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau would be doing nothing different on ship called _Normandy_ – obviously hadn't been expecting them, either, "What are you doing here? And what's with the goon squad? Couldn't you have at least _called _first?"

"This ship is under security lockdown until further notice." It was the perfect delivery. If Anderson hadn't known better, he could have imagined the two men had never met.

"Why the fuck would you want to lock us down?" Joker demanded, throwing his arms wide. "We just saved the entire human race, probably the entire _galaxy_ from the Collectors while you sat around f–... _filing paperwork_ or something."

"Joker. You docked a known terrorist ship at the biggest space station in the galaxy – at the heart of the galactic government – using forged registry identification data," Alenko remarked, voice flat. "What did you _think_ was going to happen?"

"But... we..." Joker deflected the question, "Damn it, Shepard is going to kick your ass when she gets back."

"Oh, yeah?" Alenko countered, "When's that going to be?"

"It'll be whenever she gets back, numbnuts," Joker shot back. "And not to dash your hopes or anything, but I don't think locking down her ship is going to get you into her pants this time around."

"_Gentlemen_," Anderson interrupted. Alenko straightened up; Joker backed off, but stuck out his tongue.

"It is all right, Jeff." The VI explained, "Commander Shepard has directed me to extend full authorization to Councilor Anderson upon his arrival."

"_All right_?" Joker echoed, incredulous. "How can you say it's _all right_? Don't you get it? They're going to dismantle you!"

Instead of answering the question, the VI addressed him personally. "Councilor Anderson, Commander Shepard has left you a message in her cabin. She has also left something that may be of professional interest to Commander Alenko in the cargo hold."

Between the VI's adaptive behavior and Joker's attitude, Anderson made a silent guess. Alenko made the same guess out loud. "That's not a VI."

"Alright. Let's go find this message," Anderson said, ignoring the implications he was facing for the time being. He approached the starboard door, but it locked before he could open it.

"You may find the layout of the _Normandy_ SR2 counterintuitive," the VI supplied from overhead, "Commander Shepard's cabin can only be accessed from the elevator."

"_Edie_," Joker snapped, "stop _helping_ them."

With a glance to Alenko, who had dutifully followed him, Anderson shrugged and followed the VI's directions. After the elevator doors closed, the commander heaved a heavy sigh. Anderson gave him a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.

"See? What did I tell you?"

Alenko half-smiled, half-grimaced and shook his head. Anderson sighed, himself – that had likely been the easy part.

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 2

**Prompt**: _"Kaidan's first visit to the Normandy SR2; written/viewed from the perspective of anyone BUT Kaidan or Shepard."_

**Noteworthy**: Technically, this ought to be part of _Between Lines_. But I wasn't sure I was going to include it or simply skip ahead for more Kasumi & Kaidan fun. So... ?

**Disambiguation**: My Unassuming Sole Survivors don't work for Cerberus. They sell Cerberus out at the earliest opportunity and _run like hell_.

**Published**: November 16th, 2010 on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	3. Prompt 3: In Progress

**Ahem**.

Okay, I know that Fanfic dot Net hates people for uploading non-story chapters and considers it grounds for deletion, but the story goes like this: I have a prompt 3 in progress, I just didn't finish it by the deadline and tossed it on the WiP pile. So in order to keep this collection straight without having to shuffle stories around later, I'm uploading this here placeholder.

I promise to get it done ASAP and then this offensive little blurb will be replaced with a proper ficlet. ;)


	4. Prompt 4: Old is New

**Old is New**

Refitting the _Normandy_ and bringing it up to bear as an Alliance ship seemed to be one incident after another. First there was the matter of the old crew to deal with, then the restoration, the acquisition and assignment of the new crew, and, after all that, the new CO to get used to. After he was belatedly informed that she was on board, he found her in what still labeled on his omni-tool as starboard observation.

"This ship is too roomy," she told him, as she might have told anyone else passing by. The sentiment was shared by many of the crew who were used to the more cramped atmosphere of standardized Alliance ships.

"Yeah," Kaidan agreed, coming to stand by her. "In case you forgot, _Captain_, I was supposed to give you a tour."

"I didn't say I couldn't find my way around, _Commander_," she snorted. "It'll take some getting used to, but at least you got all the monitoring devices out, right?"

"I certainly hope so." He couldn't share her humor; not that the ship didn't have the potential to be useful, but repurposing it for Alliance use was a plan with security flaws a mile wide. Scrapping it would have been safer.

They stood together in silence. Kaidan studied his new officer openly while she stared out into the view.

"You think Shepard was crazy?" the captain finally asked, looking to him directly. Most people wanting to know asked him; few of those who had previously asked him had ever actually met her.

While he avoided her gaze, Kaidan's answer was automatic. "I don't know what to think about Shepard."

The captain stared at him a minute more before looking back into the void. Kaidan had to admit, there were notable benefits when it came to working with another biotic – at the very least, he could be honest without being suspect.

It worked both ways.

"Tell you the truth," she chuckled, "I think we're screwed if we don't get our asses in gear. One woman isn't going to change that, either way."

"Yeah, I guess," Kaidan answered, noncommittal. Shepard had said much the same thing, years prior. Even he knew it, deep down.

"Well!" The captain clapped her hands together. "Wasn't that fun! Let's get acquainted with the ship, shall we?"

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 4

**Prompt**: _"Kaidan has joined the crew of the Normandy 2. He meets or has a reunion with a member of the crew for the first time since joining the crew. Shepard is not present at this meeting. _

_ There will be no sex at this meeting. No exceptions!_

_ Sex is not an option!"_

**Noteworthy**: I suppose this could come after Prompt 2, but it could just as easily be any given incarnation of "Shepard splits."

**Disambiguation**: That there's the non-Shepard War Hero, for those of you wondering.

**Published**: November 28th, 2010, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	5. Prompt 5: Youthful Enthusiasm

**Youthful Enthusiasm**

Pausing on the landing halfway to the mezzanine, he glanced back down to the floor below. He wasn't irresolute, not really, he just didn't get it. Continuing up the stairs, he kept his eyes on the man above, who had his back to the railing and suspected nothing.

Nor did Lieutenant Alenko, preoccupied with a stack of OSDs and his omni-tool, take notice of him when he made it to the table. When he did notice, it still took him a moment before he leaned back in his chair and stared. "Can I help you, Corporal?"

"Well, sir, I, uh..." Jenkins cleared his throat. "I was kinda wondering what you're doing up here all alone while the rest of us were downstairs having a blast."

"Homework, mostly," the lieutenant replied, glancing at the assortment of data.

"So..." At a loss, Jenkins threw his hands out. "Can I buy you a drink?"

Lieutenant Alenko quirked an eyebrow after the other and shifted a bit in his chair. "Am I missing something, here?"

"Most of the time officers keep to themselves, they're hardasses," Jenkins said, matter-of-fact. "You don't seem the type. If you don't mind my saying so. Uh, _sir_."

Bewildered, Alenko stared at him for a few silent moments. "You do realize I'm a biotic, right?"

"Oh," the explanation sated his curiosity, until Jenkins realized that it explained nothing, "What's that got to do with anything?"

"It tends to..." Alenko glanced down, squinting at nothing in particular. "Um..."

"Freak people out?" Jenkins ventured.

"Something like that."

"I'd think people would be used to it by now." Pulling out the nearest chair, the corporal sat down. "I mean, no offense, I know human biotics are still rare and all, but the asari have had biotics since..." he trailed off, derailed by a fact he didn't know. "How long have the asari had biotics, anyway?"

Lieutenant Alenko considered the question, then shrugged. "Longer than I've been alive."

"Right, see?" Jenkins pointed out, "It's not like it's anything new, we just didn't discover it until recently. And it's useful, right? You can knock people on their ass and stuff from a distance."

"...and then some."

"That's so cool... What's that you're working on, anyway?" the corporal asked. He began to fidget, mostly in one leg, as the question prompted Alenko to consolidate the files into one pile.

"Just going over personnel; trying to remember names mostly."

"Oh, yeah, that must be kinda neat, having access to everyone's information and everything." Jenkins said, his twitch dying off. "Hey, what's it say about me?"

For a moment, from the look he was getting, Jenkins didn't think he was going to get an answer. His fidgeting started again, just as the lieutenant nodded towards the table. "That you're excitable and opinionated, but dedicated."

"Really?" Jenkins grinned, then faltered. "Wait, that's... that's _good_, right?"

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 5

**Prompt**: _"Setting: anytime during Mass Effect 1 Prompt: Kaidan and some guy friends (yes, all males, bwahahahah*) - preferably from the Normandy, but any Alliance or Shepard-affiliated person will do - go out for some drinks. As usual, Shepard is not there, so the guys can talk about Shepard behind his/her back."_

**Noteworthy**: I miss Jenkins. :(

**Disambiguation**: So I don't think I really followed the prompt, but I couldn't come up with anything else.

**Published**: December 8th, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	6. Prompt 6: Bets Off

**Bets Off**

It was something of a surprise to find Shepard in the vehicle bay. Mostly, because he thought she was asleep. The rest seemed perfectly natural; in true Shepard fashion, she was sitting on the table with one boot propped flat against the nearest locker. Williams stood across from her, arms crossed, head cocked to one side. Kaidan had to move between them to get to his locker, although he wouldn't have been surprised to find that Shepard was keeping half a eye on him since he stepped out of the elevator to begin with.

As it was, she leaned wide to continue her conversation around him as he rummaged around, unobtrusive as possible.

"So three hundred's good, then?" Williams was asking.

"How about five hundred?"

"You're on."

"Right," Shepard agreed. "_Alenko_."

"Ma'am?" Something in her tone and in her not-quite-smile made a block of ice form in Kaidan's chest, turning his blood cold.

"You have expert timing," the commander lauded, giving no quarter as she cut straight to the point . "Drop your trousers."

Struggling to form a coherent response, Kaidan floundered, glancing back at Williams, who bit her lip and avoided his gaze. At his lack of a reply, Shepard's scrunched her eyebrows together, impatient. "Well?"

This time, he managed to squeak in protest, "... ma'am?"

"You heard me the first time," Shepard pointed out. "Drop 'em."

"What the hell for?"

"What do you think, 'what the hell for'? Williams and I have a bet going."

Apparently content with letting Shepard do most of the talking, Williams shrugged, struggling to maintain composure.

"We need a quick look at your penis," Shepard explained, matter-of-fact and dead serious. "So, chin up, trousers down, dick out; _let's go_."

By now, the shock had worn off, and a subtle anger was seeping in to replace it. "I don't think so."

Shepard picked up the challenge in his voice and threw it back at him. "You don't think so?"

"No," Kaidan repeated calmly, tapping the button to close his locker. "I don't think so."

Ashley finally piped up behind him, "That, uh... sounds like insubordination to me, LT."

"Insubordination?" Kaidan scoffed. He spared one more glance between them before turning on his heel and tossing over his shoulder, "You know what? Write me up on that one."

Narrowly avoiding Wrex as the krogan ambled down to his eked out living space, Kaidan made a beeline for the elevator. Wrex spared him a second glance, then _humph_ed at the two women nearby before settling in.

"You should have put the whammy on him." Ashley sighed, scuffing her boot against the floor. "Now what do we do?"

Shepard winced as her boot lost traction on the locker hit the table with a heavy clunk. After a moment's consideration, she nodded towards the elevator. "I bet Chakwas would know."

"_Hmmm_," Ashley chirped, perking up. "Good idea!"

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 6

**Prompt**: _"An argument, between two or more persons, set anywhere with the exception below. Limit: Kaidan must be one of the participants or the argument must be about Kaidan. THE ARGUMENT CANNOT BE ON; CANNOT BE ABOUT; CANNOT MENTION IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM HORIZON."_

**Noteworthy**: My MainShep is very good friends with Ashley. Together, they give Kaidan hell like only women can.

**Disambiguation**: I don't consider this in any given fic continuity of mine, but it could probably fit in any one of them. x_x

**Published**: December 16, 2010, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	7. Prompt 7: In Progress

**Ahem.**

Okay, I know that Fanfic dot Net hates people for uploading non-story chapters and considers it grounds for deletion, but the story goes like this: I have a prompt 3 in progress, I just didn't finish it by the deadline and tossed it on the WiP pile. So in order to keep this collection straight without having to shuffle stories around later, I'm uploading this here placeholder.

I promise to get it done ASAP and then this offensive little blurb will be replaced with a proper ficlet. ;)


	8. Prompt 8: A Distinct Lack of Plans

**A Distinct Lack of Plans**

It was strange thing, to see the ship so empty. There were a handful of Alliance crewmen on the Command Deck, the rest reveling in the space port. Liara took advantage of the solitary silence, spreading her data across the mess table.

"Oh!"

When she had inquired earlier as to Shepard's location, Joker had been very explicit in informing her that Alenko was treating Shepard to a meal, which Liara assumed meant in the spaceport. His arrival came as a surprise, and she found herself inexplicably in his way.

"Don't worry about it," Alenko tossed over his shoulder as he prepared his food. He seated himself across from her, at a gap in her clutter. "What's that you're working on?"

Liara smiled a bit, and waved a hand over the bits and pieces and data pads.

"Data from Prothean... " What was the word? "_archives_. Archives."

"Huh." Alenko might have commented further, except Shepard chose that moment to appear, pausing only long enough to fetch a cup of tea. If she were surprised or disappointed, it didn't show.

"Liara, you know, when I said for everybody to take time, that included you, right?" she asked. Alenko rescued a data pad from under her boots as the commander kicked her feet up on the table; he held it across to Liara, who took it gratefully. Shepard glanced at him, then at Liara, then appraised the assortment of chaos littering the table.

"I... understand, Shepard." Liara explained, "I was not working on anything meaningful to the... the destruction, but prosaic concerns of individuals regarding daily life and views."

For a moment, the commander stared at her, then shrugged.

"Whatever turns you on," she replied, sipping her tea. Lacking an assisted translation, Liara wasn't sure what she meant, nor whether her own explanation rang true. However, given Shepard's still relaxed demeanor and the faint lilt to her voice, Liara guessed it was meant in warm spirit.

"Sounds very interesting," Alenko offered from the side. Shepard snorted, and, catching her eye, he amended, "If you haven't had lifetimes of Prothean culture uploaded into your brain against your will, it sounds interesting."

Focusing his attention to the tray of food before him, Alenko either missed or ignored Shepard's languid gaze.

"So," Liara attempted to break the sudden silence, gathering her data pads together into a single pile. "You changed plans."

Shepard glanced at her. "What plans?"

Liara blinked, tentatively repeating the information that Joker had given her. "When I asked your location this evening, Joker said that Lieutenant Alenko would be eating you out tonight."

Shepard's stare turned piercing. Alenko studied his spoon, stopped in its ascent halfway from the bowl; his face underwent a subtle pigment change.

Liara glanced between them, then down at her hands. "I apologize for prying. It sounded pleasant to think of. I know you and Captain Anderson habitually-..."

"Liara." The asari forced herself to meet Shepard's unwavering gaze. "From now on, when talking to Joker, we leave the translator _on_. Okay?"

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 8

**Prompt**: _"Kaidan and Shepard want to have the perfect dinner together. Limit: They plot and plan around the crew. Do they succeed? Well that's up to you."_

**Noteworthy**: So this one won round 8. Way to go, crude sexual humor?

**Disambiguation**: So I've got it in my head that Liara would be the type to try to learn human languages to better understand and fit in with the Normandy crew. Thus, no translator.

**Published**: January 5th, 2011, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	9. Prompt 10: Waiting

**Waiting**

The moment the door slid open, his eyes were already on her. Kaidan didn't move from the open terrace, but instead watched her confident approach. Sparing the desk half a glance as she passed it by, she stepped up to the balustrade beside him.

"How're you holding up?" she asked, leaning on the curvilinear metal architecture to watch the goings on below. A warm summer breeze danced over the scattered trees, rippling the lakes.

"Can't complain." After a moment's contemplation, Kaidan shrugged, amending, "Much."

Shepard bit back a smile. "Anything you want to talk about?"

"Nothing that Anderson hasn't already heard." He nodded at nothing in particular. "What brings you all the way up here?"

It was Shepard's turn to shrug. "I had a few minutes to spare, thought I'd drop in."

"Just checking in on me, huh?" Kaidan chuckled, glancing out over the Presidium. "You should stop by more often; it's always nice to see you're still in one piece."

For a time, they stood together in amicable silence. Eventually, Shepard sighed, slumping a bit as she pushed up off the railing.

"I should go," she announced. "I'll talk to you later?"

Kaidan smiled, albeit wryly. "I'm not going anywhere."

Considerate of the arsenal she carried around on her back, Kaidan drew her into a gentle embrace, which Shepard returned, lingering a moment longer. With an unspoken _be careful_ hanging between them, she left as resolutely as she had come; Kaidan watched until the door slid closed after her.

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 10

**Prompt**: "Coca Cola proudly presents; Life as it should be! Well, we all know that ME2 didn't do too great a job remembering the VS. So what should it have been like, talking to Joker/Garrus/Chakwas/Kelly/someone else after Horizon, or Kasumi in her scene, or Liara in hers? Should we have gotten another scene entirely at some point acknowledging Kaidans existance?"

**Noteworthy**: Shortly before this prompt showed up, I'd been talking to someone about how great it'd be if Kaidan had been in an office after Horizon, like Liara, and we could visit him any time we damn well pleased. So when the prompt showed up, well... I knew what it was gonna be, even if I'll likely be writing something more in depth later.

**Disambiguation**: So I guess this wouldn't work for a lot of people, who want an apology or whatever. But I tried to make it kind of ambiguous, _what happens when you come to visit_, kind of thing.

**Published**: January 27th, 2011, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


	10. Prompt 11: Flowers

**Flowers**

Kaidan stared at the display, reading the latest lurid text transmission of unknown origin. It was certainly very... _imaginative_. Turning off the terminal with a wave of his hand, he glanced back at Shepard, she was snapping a high explosive mod to the detonator on her grenade belt.

"I'm glad I never tried to send you any love letters." She didn't answer, instead laying the grenades alongside the rest of her heavily modded weaponry before hefting her armor case onto the table. Kaidan swept his fingers through his hair, pausing to scratch the back of his neck. "You don't think this is all a little excessive?"

"Remember the last time I had a secret admirer?" Shepard asked, stripping down with brusque efficiency. Her shirt went flying past him, landing magnificently short of the bed. Her trousers followed, on a significantly shorter trajectory.

"Okay, you have a point there. But think this through: whoever he is, this guy seems to have given you plenty of warning; _not_ _going_ is a perfectly viable option." The commander shot him a withering glare, and Kaidan immediately leapt to his feet. "Right. I'll get Liara; we'll meet you in the airlock."

-o-o-o-

The rendezvous point was in a neglected corner of the Upper Wards... not abandoned, but easy to overlook and eerily quiet in the middle of the so-called night. A dead-end alley, square against a bulkhead and shadowed by overhangs on either side, it seemed to be a forgotten architectural oversight.

"This is a little suspicious," Kaidan admitted.

"No cover to speak of; no easy vantage points from the street; no good escape routes." Shepard sighed, thinking aloud, "Not a good place to get pinned down in." She looked to Kaidan and nodded towards the alley. "Surveillance?"

Pulling up his omni-tool, Kaidan ran a cursory survey of the area, followed by a more in depth scan.

"Nothing," he reported, shaking his head at the display. "At all."

Shepard studied the alley for several long moments, shoulders slumping under the weight of her decision.

"All right," she said. "Liara."

Having stood by patiently, Liara instantly perked up from the rearguard. "Yes, Commander?"

"I want you up on that street there," Shepard pointed to one of the overhangs. "Kaidan, take the opposite side. That should give enough coverage in case this is a trap."

"I'd rather find something a little closer than that," Kaidan remarked, glancing up and down the open corridor to no avail.

"There's nothing on this level that wouldn't be a tip off." Shepard summoned forth her omni-tool, booting a kinetic barrier algorithm. "Besides, if there is a fight, I think the two of you would be more useful out of danger and raining hellfire from above."

"Can I say that this plan feels unnecessarily reckless?"

The omni-tool shimmered closed. "Noted."

Kaidan reached for her shoulder, then thought better of it. His hand ghosted down her arm until he could entwine her fingers with his own; he squeezed gently. "Be careful."

"If I can survive a Reaper falling on me, I can sure as hell survive a creep in a dark alley." There was a challenge in her eyes as she met his gaze; it softened, and she squeezed his hand back. "But I will."

They left her alone, and she took up position in the alley, pistol drawn, back to the wall. _That_ was comfortable at least. At length, the implant in her ear crackled.

"_In position_," Kaidan informed her over the comm. "_I hope you know what you're doing, Shepard_."

A moment later, Liara checked in. "_As am... do I_."

From her best-defensible corner, she glanced up, but could see neither of them. The time in the final letter she had received was hours yet. Now, all she had to do was wait.

Ten minutes past when the letter said – so much for cautious planning – a man peeked around the corner of the wall. Shepard immediately drew a bead, incredulous as she recognized him. Ignorant or foolhardy, he grinned widely upon seeing her.

"Oh, good, I wasn't sure you'd make it."

"What're you doing here?" Shepard asked before her mind caught up with her mouth. She put the pieces together, simultaneously thunderstruck as the man in front of her explained himself. Her aim never wavered from his unarmored chest.

"It's me, Conrad Verner," he said, strutting forward and confident as you please. He kept his arms at an odd angle behind his back. "I sent you the letters."

"Stop," Shepard intoned flatly, "walking towards me. Hands where I can see them."

Conrad stopped, pouting. "But that would ruin the surprise!"

"Conrad, in my line of work, surprises are generally a bad thing and end with the people I care about getting killed. So: Hands. Now. Please."

"Oh," Conrad chuckled amiably. "I hadn't thought of that. Here!"

In one fast, fluid motion – too fast, for Shepard's liking – he showed his hands; in one he held a heart-shaped box, and in the other a stunningly extravagant bouquet of flowers. The soldier flicked her eyes from the man's face to his bounty. "Mind telling me what all this is about?"

"These are for you. I wanted to give you something for St. Valentine's Day!"

It took Shepard a moment to register what he was even talking about. "I thought you were married."

"I am," Conrad explained, "But I thought – and my wife would agree – that saving the galaxy is hard, lonely work. So I figured I'd arrange to meet with you and tell you how much you're appreciated, which is a lot by the way."

"Okay, fine. That's... very nice," Shepard managed, relaxing her stance if not her guard. "Now, why the hell would you want to meet me all the way down here?"

"I knew you'd appreciate a little excitement. Secret meetings in dark alleys... it's _extreme_," Conrad made a hand gesture Shepard was unfamiliar with, but it seemed benign enough. The snickering in her earpiece, she was less inclined to forgive. "Cool, huh?"

"And _nobody_ put you up to this?" she pressed, as part of her was still waiting on the inevitable ambush.

"Nope." Conrad beamed. "It was all my idea." He held out the flowers and the heart-shaped candy box, and Shepard holstered her weapon to take them, adrenaline wearing thin and being replaced with utter bafflement. "I should go. My transport leaves in about an hour, and you know how travel can be. See you again later!"

"Yeah, uh... thanks."

"Bye!"

"Goodbye."

Shepard stood, stunned. She stared at the flowers as though they were carnivorous.

"_That wasn't so bad_," Kaidan said. When she didn't answer, he asked, "_You okay_?"

"I'm fine," Shepard replied, terse.

"_Want us to come down_?"

"Negative... I, uh... I'm heading back, meet me on the way."

"_Copy._"

She stood a while longer before shaking it off and backtracking the way she'd come. Liara caught up with her on the street, while Kaidan was waiting for them at the elevator to the Presidium.

"No poison or kidnapping this time," Kaidan mused.

"That's true," Liara agreed. "And a good thing."

Shepard huffed, tossing the bouquet over her shoulder at Liara and slapping Kaidan with the box of candy. Unburdened, she crossed her arms and waited for the elevator to reach its destination. "So I'm paranoid. Laugh all you want."

-o-o-o-

By the time they reached the _Normandy_ airlock and were waiting on decontamination, Shepard had relaxed a touch, or so Kaidan imagined.

"Hey, Shepard?"

"What?"

"What he said back there... about saving the galaxy being... hard, lonely work... is any of that true?"

Shepard shrugged, considering a bit. "Hard, sometimes. Lonely," she graced him with the subtlest of smiles, "not at all."

Returning the smile, Kaidan reached out to caress her cheek, only to jerk his hand back as the _Normandy_'s VI announced the end of the decontamination process and the airlock simultaneously slid open.

"Excuse me," Liara squeaked, cradling her flowers as she slipped between them.

Some days, the galaxy could have expert timing.

* * *

**Working Title**: Prompt 11

**Prompt**: _"Kaidan or Shepard is/are trying to find a way to spend Valentine's day together and alone. Follow one of them (or both of them) for a bit, where, no matter how hard they try, nothing goes right."_

**Noteworthy**: So... again, not quite the prompt. Alas.

**Disambiguation**: For what it's worth, I wrote most of this while high on sleep deprivation. If anything doesn't make sense, I apologize. XD

**Published**: February 7th, 2011, on the KAAS Prompt Project.

_Derivative work of material © BioWare, Electronic Arts._


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